The sponsor who wants a report is buying the wrong thing. A chair, a PE partner, a founder who still paid, a group CFO sitting above an incoming operator — they have a legitimate worry about money, time, and whether the series is still the right contract. Those worries are not a licence to hear last Tuesday’s material. They are a reason to write a process they can live with: dates and scope, not content. A dashboard of “how coaching is going” is a file. Coaching will not produce it. I decline it.
Chief Executives books one-to-one coaching for one seat. Process can be shared if you agree that in writing. Content stays with the executive. The ICF Code of Ethics is not a mood. Conflicts and confidentiality are the product. Safety and legality are named exceptions. They are not a back door for “I thought you should know.”
Peter Drucker’s What Makes an Effective Executive put the weight on decision, not on a report about a conversation. If the chair needs a decision from the chief executive, they should hear it from the chief executive, in the chief executive’s words, at a time the chief executive chose. Borrowing the coach as a messenger is how the confidential hour becomes a second chair.
What the chair is entitled to
Dates. That meetings are happening. The agreed stretch of work, in the language of the brief, not in the language of last Tuesday. A review date at which the executive — not the coach — can say whether the contract still fits. That is process. It can be written on a card. It can be said in ten minutes.
The chair is not entitled to themes, sentiment, “what I am seeing,” or a RAG status for the inner weather of the seat. Themes are how content is laundered into process. “We are hearing concern about pace” is still content. If the executive wants to take pace to the chair, they can say it. They cannot ask me to say it so they remain the kind listener.
Write the rule before they ask. Incoming seats attract sponsors. Sponsors attract leaks. Design beats hope. The skip-level that becomes a leak is the same mechanism on the floor. A sponsor report is the same mechanism above.
Four sponsor requests I decline
“Just a short read-out after each session.” A short read-out is a file. I will not write it. If the executive wants to tell the chair something, they will tell the chair.
“Coach the team and tell me how they are doing.” That is a report and a committee. You cannot coach a committee. One brief per seat. No master file.
“I paid, so I should sit in once.” Once is a political fact. A founder who still thinks of the CEO seat as theirs will ask this. A founder still in the room is still the chair. I will not take the joint session. A process conversation about dates and scope is allowed. A session is not.
“Send me the pack they are working from.” The pack is theirs. A sounding board is not an editor of feelings and not a document control function. A sounding board is not a second chair.
Silence after a board is often why the chair asks. They heard a nod and then a corridor. That is the executive’s job to name, not the coach’s job to confirm. Silence after the board is not agreement. If the chair wants to know whether the ELT is aligned, they should hear it from the CEO.
How to write the rule so it survives the first ask
A brief that cannot name this rule is not yet a brief. Three sentences are enough.
- The chair may know that meetings are happening, on which cadence, against which stretch of work.
- The chair does not hear the material unless the executive takes a specific point into that relationship themselves.
- There is a review date. The executive owns the sentence at that review.
If you cannot keep those sentences, you do not yet have work to book. A sponsor who cannot live with them is buying a different product: diagnostics, a review, a search brief. Name it as that product. Do not borrow the confidentiality of coaching to run a quiet appraisal.
The Financial Reporting Council’s Guidance on Board Effectiveness (July 2018) is useful on information the board actually needs. It does not need a coaching file. It needs the decision, the risk, the option you discarded. Those belong in the paper, in the executive’s words.
I will not produce a mid-series “impact summary” for a PE pack. If the series is still the right contract, the executive can say so. If it is not, end it. A report will not make a bad brief good.
The first ask usually arrives as a courtesy. “Just so I know it is landing.” Courtesy is how a file starts. Write the rule in the brief before the first hour, and repeat it the first time they ask. If you improvise, you will give away a sentence you cannot take back. A chair who can live with dates and scope is buying coaching. A chair who cannot is buying a different product, and they should name it. Do not start until they have named it.
A takeaway you can keep
| Sponsor request | What it is | What I will offer |
|---|---|---|
| A read-out after each hour | A file | Dates and scope only |
| Sit in once | A second chair | No |
| Coach the team and report | A committee with a dashboard | Decline |
| An impact summary for the fund | Content, laundered | The executive’s sentence at a review date |
If the stretch is one seat and a chair who will ask, write the rule first, then enquire. If the stretch is a report, do not dress it as coaching. Fees and fit stay in writing. Paying for the hour is not the same as sitting in it.